That's hot

So I found a whole bunch of tutorials online for Photoshop CS2.

Wait, let's start over.

So, I downloaded Adobe Photoshop CS2 after all the time I spent complaining how much I didn't like it, how different it was, yada-yada-yada.

I like it.

It's SO cool. I like it. I'm sorry I didn't give it a chance before. I don't like change. All I've ever known is Photoshop Elements and I was scared to change.

I'm still trying to figure out some things with CS2, but overall I'm enjoying it.

Anyway, back to my blog:

So I found a whole bunch of tutorials online for Photoshop CS2. I've been trying to learn where things are and what new features they added. I wanted to try to find as many tutorials that I could that only used the tools and filters in Photoshop, cause I'm really not a photographer, and I'd like some digital artwork to put in my portfolio.

Check out what I made:

There are four layers there I believe. I made it using a black background, white text, and filters (I think I used wind, Gaussian blur, and liquify) and I learned how to colorize. Properly. I never really understood it before -- most of what I knew about Photoshop is what I found out on my own, and I guess I haven't played around with enough to find this. Unless this is new to CS2, but somehow I doubt this.

Anyway, I know I probably could have made this in Elements, but that's not the point. The point is, I'd say that I only know how to use the filters independently of one another -- I never really mix them, I just use them to enhance photos. But! I'm learning to make stuff. How awesome is that? I'm learning.

I've never ever really focused on making digital art before. It's always been posters and layouts. And when there was "art" involved, I usually only used the bevels and shadows (see my "He loves me" artwork). So I'm super excited, guys. Super excited.

I've found like a bijillion tutorials too -- they are just like, Quicktime videos so they're easy to follow cause I can pause and see the other person's screen and what they're doing -- so I'm going to try to learn as much as I can from these.

Oh, I hope you see more!

P.S. I also made this little guy using a cloud brush that I made:
I also discovered blending options and masks through this tutorial. I was slightly less impressed with the cloud. It didn't turn out quite right. It wasn't supposed to be this cartoon-y. The fire was much cooler. But it's good to know I can make clouds now, huh?

I am not schizophrenic

Justine Louise Dechaine
1988-2006

I like to believe that a part of you is still with me. And I hope that, to some extent, this is true. You've really taught me a lot about myself (oh, the irony), and it makes me happy just to know that you were with me through everything I've been through. It makes me happy to know that this is who I really was, that in spite of everything, this is how I turned out. It still makes me happy.

Bored on a Monday afternoon, I decided to take a trip down Memory Lane and revisit the "days of old." I went to my old blog. My MSN Messenger/Windows Live blog. Whatever you want to call it. I read every post there.

I cried about a lot of it, but there were a few things that made me laugh. I'm happy about who I was a year or so ago. I'm proud of who I was, the way I wrote and what I wrote, and the thoughts and feelings I had. I didn't think anything of them at the time -- I was just a girl with a blog and a whole lot of heart -- but I'm really proud of everything I wrote there.

For those of you who haven't known me that long or who just haven't cared enough to venture out into the world of MSN Spaces, I'll post this web address.

Here you go.

I'll warn you that my life may not seem as interesting on this website as it was in reality. I'm not giving you this link so that you might be entertained. No.

I actually don't know why I'm giving you this link. I've done so much to get rid of that blog. By which I mean, I started a new one, "a clean slate," to quote my MSN Space.

But do with it what you will. Most of all, enjoy it. Because the girl that wrote these things put a lot of emotion, effort, and, in the end, herself into her words, and I think she had a lot of good ideas and a lot of worthwhile thoughts. I'm proud to say she's a part of me still, and I hope I never lose her. I've been through a lot in my little life, but I've always been that girl. And I hope nothing that I will go through in the future can wash her away.

The text at the beginning of this post -- the words that look like they belong on a headstone: they do not mean that this Justine has died or gone away. She is still very much a part of me.

I just wanted to let her know that I'm proud of her, and that I always knew she could make it. I always had faith in her, deep down inside. Amidst everything that has happened in my life, I guess I never took the time to recognize her or tell her she was doing a good job. Maybe I was a little hard on her or didn't have enough faith at times, but I need her to know that I loved her. I'm happy she's who I am and I hope that she will always be that happy, semi-funny, look-on-the-bright-side girl I know she was.

Here's to another eighteen years of battling enemies and conquering your fears.

Where's my cape?

Little Red Riding Hood

I am taking a Creative Writing course this term. It's similar to the class I took in high school (Writer's Craft). Every week we do a workshop where two people bring in some of their work and everyone else critiques it and gives them feedback.

So tonight I was looking through my computer for things that I've written that I could bring in on my workshop day. I found this "play" I wrote for Writer's Craft. It was an assignment. We all had to write something about Little Red Riding Hood, but we had to be creative about it. We could change all the details we wanted, it could be a narrative, a poem, whatever.

I think mine's a poem truthfully, but because there are different speakers, we'll call it a play.

Here you go! Enjoy.

------------------------------------------------------

Justine's Little Red Riding Hood

Mother:
Go to your grandmother’s house today,

But stay on the path; don’t you stray.

Little Red Riding Hood:
I know, I know; I’ve gone there before.
It’s only a short walk. Ten minutes, no more.

Mother:
Just promise, be careful Red Riding Hood.
Please stay on the path. For once, be good!

Little Red Riding Hood:
I promise you Mother, the safe way I’ll take.
But what am I bringing? Some cookies? A cake?

Mother:
Take this basket of breads and pastries.
Grandma will love it; they sure are tasty!

Narrator:
So Little Red Riding Hood put on her cape
And ran through the forest so she wouldn’t be late.
She ran over hills, through meadows and fields.
She needed to move quickly to bring Grandma her meal.
She ran looking forward, without turning back
Until she felt something tug on her cap.

Wolf:
Where are you going in such a big hurry?
Please, you can tell me. There’s no need to worry.

Little Red Riding Hood:
I’m going to see Grandma; she’s waiting for me.
My mother had told her I’d be there by three.

Wolf:
I know a shortcut to get you there faster!
Maybe you’ll help me find what I’ve been after…

Little Red Riding Hood:
I’m sorry; I’d love to come help with your task,
But I promised my mother I’d stay on the path.

Narrator:
The wolf begged and pleaded, but still she said no.
It didn’t bother the wolf though; he knew where to go.
He ran and he hurried and came to the house,
And while Grandma lay sleeping, snuck in like a mouse.
“I’ll show that girl,” the evil wolf said,
And he gobbled up Grandma, right in her bed.

Little Red Riding Hood:
Grandma, I’m here! It’s me, Riding Hood.
I brought you some baking. It smells really good!

Wolf (disguised as Grandma):
Come here to my bedside. I’m so tired and old.
These pastries are sure to help with my cold.

Little Red Riding Hood:
Oh Grandma! You really have let yourself go!
You’ve changed quite a bit; I thought you should know.
Your eyes are much larger, your mouth is much wider—

Narrator:
And then the old wolf sank his teeth deep inside her.
That mean old wolf gobbled up Red like a dumpling.
Then in came the woodsman who thought he heard something.

Woodsman:
Hello. May I enter? Is anyone here?
I heard screams of terror, and panic, and fear!

Wolf:
Oh, hello kind woodsman! No, no. It’s just me.
I dropped some old dishes while making my tea.

Woodsman:
Did you need any help? Something I could do?
I wouldn’t want to leave such a mess all for you.

Wolf:
No, that’s okay, darling. I’m really alright.
This happens quite often: two, three times a night.

Narrator:
And then from the belly of that awful beast
Arose such a screaming, and it would not cease.
And just as the woodsman had turned ’round to leave,
That nasty, old wolf snatched him back by the sleeve!
He gobbled the woodsman, ate even his hat.
Then the wolf was so full that he needed a nap.
He took off the nightgown and crawled into bed.
Then he fluffed up his pillow and lay down his head.

So there the wolf stayed, his head fills with dreams.
No one heard Grandma’s and Little Red’s screams,
And forever and after, their deaths were a mystery,
A story, a tale: one moment in history.

Second masterpiece

Okay, guys. Portfolio is going very well. I'm excited.

This one is a little abstract. I'm a little disappointed only because on the orange background, all the black lines looked super cool, and my female-statue-thing covered them up. But there was nothing I could do to salvage them, unless I wanted my statue to be tiny and in the corner. I could have, I suppose, moved her over to the right side, but I decided against it; I like her better on the left.

The statue is blue and the highlights, or shadows or whatever you would like to call them, are teal. The top part of the background is black, and the area of the "table" underneath the statue that looks so white in this photograph is light grey, and does not stick out that much from the grey table.

Sorry about the colours on my camera. I don't know why they come out that way. Maybe it's something to do with using no flash. I don't use a flash, obviously, because I don't want it to reflect off the painting.

What do you think?

Should I take out the lines in the center of the statue (the "crotch" area) or leave them in. I'm thinking of taking them out, but I'm really not sure.

I made an enemy today

His name is Statistics.

He stalks me wherever I go.

He wakes me up at 8:00 in the morning on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays and laughs at me as I run against the chills of wind to make it to his class on time.

He is always in my head, taunting me, telling me of all the work I've left to do.
He throws down his silly equations and problems only to make a mockery of me, of what I am, and of how little I know.

He gives me assignments with faraway deadlines when he knows that I won't touch them until two nights before.

Then, when I try to solve his problems in advance, he toughens up and tortures me. If I dare surpass his wit and discover an equation that will be helpful, Statistics cruelly tears away the numbers that I need to solve his trials, leaving me with not but a useless equation of z, x-bar, mu-not, sigma, and n.

Statistics haunts me in my nightmares and leaves me tossing and turning with cold sweats and mathematical hot flashes throughout the nights.

You dare taunt me, Statistics? Mock me? Go on. I dare you.

This is war.

I made an enemy today.

Found poetry

Tonight in Creative Writing, we learned about "found poetry," a term that Mr. Power actually taught to us in Grade 12, but my prof today talked about it as well... Except he called it something different. I forget though.

Anyway, we all got a random page (page 155 if you must know) from a book called Caucasia -- I haven't read it -- and were told to make a found poem. Here is what I created:

Oblivious,
a dark silhouette.

Imagine us, our home:
true comfort.

My chin
permanently in this place,
staying still.

Waking up lucid
in that place of timelessness.

A painting faraway
beckoning me.

Yes, punctuation, capitalization, and spacing were added. Here's how to make your own found poetry!

Justine's Super Awesome Guide To Super Awesome Fun Found Poetry

Step One: Take a page out of a book, a page from a newspaper article, etc. Any piece of literature will work. Please photocopy the page if it is not your own copy of the work and/or if you plan to read it ever again.

Step Two: Grab a black marker or a pen or any sort of writing utensil. Even a highlighter will work. Go through and blackout all the words you don't want to use in your poem (or highlight the words you've chosen to use). You probably want to pick out single words or short phrases, and try to space them out a bit so you aren't simply retelling the story you have in front of you.

Step Three: Take those words you've chosen and keeping them in order (this is key), create a wonderful masterpiece of a poem!

Here's an example using a chunk of an essay I wrote last term on Hinduism and rebirth. [The white words are those I've selected to use in my poem]:

Members of all religions have different outlooks on both life and death. There are those that believe in a finite lifetime, that the only time you have is that spent on earth. There are others that believe in an afterlife of heavens and hells where the evil are punished and the good reap rewards. Others believe we are reincarnated at the time of death. In fact, most Eastern religions foster a theory of rebirth. One of the most elaborate doctrines of rebirth can be found in Hinduism.

In order to fully understand the Hindu cycle of life and death, there are several terms with which we must familiarize ourselves. In our exploration we will discuss the concepts of brahman and atman, the cycle of samsara, the law of karma, and the attainment of moksa.

The first thing that we must understand is that, unlike most Western cultures, the Hindu population does not believe in one God who created the universe. Instead, Hindus believe in a concept called brahman. Brahman is not a god, but a reality. More specifically, it is the “unchanging, infinite” reality and the foundation of life (“Brahman”). Brahman is often referred to as the “ultimate reality,” the one truth of the universe (Rice 71).

This was a bad essay to choose, as you can see, but our "found poem" would go something like this:

All the time spent on earth,
Rewards at the time of death,
Elaborate cycle.
Several cultures believe in God.
Who created the universe?
A concept called reality,
the foundation of life,
the one truth.

See! It's easy! And fun! [Okay, so that wasn't the most beautiful poem ever, but you see the point.]

So go find a book that you hate or have no intention of reading and get your money's worth. Make reading fun with found poetry!

Oh God, I need a life.

Digital artwork

Here is my latest creation.

I am happy with this.

Any suggestions about where to place the words? I want them off-centre, but I don't want them to cover that last daisy, but I feel that the words should be near it.


Enjoy!

P.S. Remember you can view larger by clicking.

I wish painting had an undo button

I am très contente with this piece, but man, oh man, did it take me a long time because of all the mistakes I was making! I painted this in about 4 and a half hours... straight.

[The colour is a little off in the photo. Her skin is less purple and more brown, and same with the hand -- although the hand is actually purplish in the painting as well, just not that badly.]

But it turns out that I can draw people pretty decently. Excellent. This one's going into my portfolio, I think. We'll see what other masterpieces I can make.

I have to go back to this one and fix the knuckles (ugh, I can't do those!) as well as the fingernails (they must be darker/not yellow), so if anyone has any tips or tricks for knuckles or nails, let me know. I think I have a plan with the knuckles, but I can't figure out the fingernails.

I also bought eight more canvases -- my, oh my, I wish I had a job -- cause I figure if I do a whole bunch of paintings I can pick the best instead of just doing however many I need. You know what I mean?

All right. Enjoy.

Please help me

So, I have decided after much, much thought, as well as much, much money spent on university-world classes, housing, and supplies, that I am going to get my degree in Graphic Design after all.

Isn't that lovely?

Here's my dilemma. The BFA with Honours in Graphic Design at the University of Manitoba -- yes, I've decided to stay -- is provided by the School of Art. Fine Arts.

Which means that I have to submit a portfolio becau-au-ause I have not taken any art courses becau-au-ause I did not plan on going into Fine Arts.

Now, "designer" I may be, but artist I am not. I haven't drawn a picture by hand since Grade 10, and I haven't painted a thing since Grade 8. Please help me!

Today I went to the Bookstore, after much, much contemplation and thought, and spent $77.00 on art supplies. Which is actually a pretty good deal, apparently, because a lot of it was 40% off or 50% off PLUS I had a 30% off coupon.

What did I buy?

• TriArt High Viscosity acrylic paint (yellow, blue, red, black, white)
• White Taklon paintbrushes -- I'll be honest: I don't know what that means (a round one, a flat one, an angled flat one, and a liner)
• a little Staedtler tin of softleaded drawing pencils
• a 9x12 inch sketchpad
• one 9x12 inch cotton canvas panel
• one 11x14 canvas panel
  
• one 8x10 stretched cotton canvas

...and that's it. Seventy-seven smack-a-roos. They had this amazing colour wheel though that spun and stuff to show you what happens when you add black and white and I wanted to buy it so badly (because I know what colours make what colours but I always have troubles adding black and white and getting the colour I want) but it was like ten bucks, and so I was like, "Pfft! I can find that online..."

But I did not.

Anyway, the point of this entry:


This is what I painted today. This is the first thing I've painted in nearly five years. I'm embarrassed, a little bit, but bear with me. I'm learning all over. I'm not sure if she'll make it into my portfolio. Since I am literally making it from scratch -- when it's supposed to be my best work -- I may just end up throwin' her in there.

This is acrylic paint on one of the 9x12 canvas panels I bought. She reminds me of the dancer girl from that commercial. "Folger's in your cup..." I'm not satisfied with her legs. Or her dress. Or her arms. I liked the background before I painted her. Because I drew her a few times on paper first, but holding a brush is much different when drawing, so I wasn't able to paint her as well as I had sketched her out. Overall, not what I had hoped for, but pretty much what I'd expected. Comments would be greatly appreciated by anyone -- anyone? -- who reads this thing. Please give me advice on how to paint better. I know it's hard to tell what the painting is like from the photograph, but please. I've got to have some artsy -- any? -- friends out there somewhere.

Oh, P.S. I'm not quite finished with this yet. The pink part on the left side will eventually become a curtain, like a stage (also, you can't tell, but at about mid-dress, the background is darker and has some brown in it; it's supposed to be a stage). I just have to decide how I want to do the detail and what I want it to look like. So more will come of this piece.

Haha, "piece..." I sound like such an artist.

Charlotte's Web

1973 vs 2006

I was not impressed, Paramount Pictures, Walden Media, Kerner Entertainment Company, and Nickelodeon Movies. Not at all. So many of you went in on this movie and yet it was not up to par. Here are some reasons why:

Each and every one of the characters -- human and animal -- sounded exactly the same. Monotone is not the right word, but the speech in this film was pretty emotionless. Was it that everyone was trying to be so serious about it? Because, frankly, it made the movie a bit boring.

Gussy, gussy, gussy. Did the animals even have names in 1973? I don't think they did. Well, Wilbur and Charlotte and Templeton did of course. But the geese, cows, and sheep? I don't think they did. I may be wrong. This is not a big problem though. I didn't mind that they named the animals. It was cute. Way to go 2006.

But back to my point: Oprah, Oprah, Oprah. I watched your show, and I didn't even make a big deal about the fact that you called Julia Roberts the "star" of the movie just because she plays Charlotte. The book/movie may be called Charlotte's Web, but she is not -- and I'm sorry Julia, but this is not personal -- the star. The star of the movie is Wilbur. After him, Charlotte and Fern, and maybe a little bit Templeton, but mainly Wilbur.

This is beside the point.

I watched your show and you got me so excited for this movie. So excited that even when I found out that Cedric the Entertainer was playing Golly, I still managed to keep my hopes up high. But Oprah, I am sorry to say that you did not do Gussy any justice whatsoever. Once again, you sounded exactly like all the other characters. And Gussy, of all characters should have sounded unique. Her speech was unique in the 1973 movie (and I assume in the book as well, although truthfully I have not read the book -- Sorry E. B. White) but lines that emphasized this (such as "That's my Golly-olly-olly") were quite, quite limited. I think I counted three.

By far, the biggest disappointment with this movie was the fact that, in the 1973 version, Charlotte can't spell. She has a big vocabulary and blah-de-blah-blah-blah, but she could not spell. That is part of the reason she asked Templeton to bring back the words -- so she could copy them.

It is not so much the fact that they made Charlotte know how to spell that upset me, but that in doing this they got rid of my favourite, favourite line in the 1973 Charlotte's Web When Charlotte asks the barn animals if any of them know how to spell "terrific," the Goose (now Gussy) says:

I think it's T double-E double-R double-R
double-I double-F double-I double-C, C, C...

That is the best line in the movie and they took it out and ruined it. The goose was not done justice at all. She was supposed to be mothery and protective, and she wasn't. And who could blame her? They sold her babies. In 1973, those babies followed Wilbur around like there was no tomorrow. Sigh.

As well, I missed the songs. I missed the singing. Especially Templeton's smorgasbord song, Wilbur's "I can talk!" song, and the songs that Fern sings to Wilbur at the beginning. Although, Dakota Fanning did sing to Wilbur in bed at one point.

Avery was more of a jerk in 1973 than in 2006, which I neither like nor dislike. I thought 2006 Avery was a cute little boy though, so I guess that makes it okay.

One of the scenes I wished they would have put in the 2006 movie I might have dreamt up in my head, but doesn't Wilbur get jealous (more sad, really) at the fair because Fern is spending so much time with that boy from school and not visiting Wilbur as much? I missed that scene. Poor Wilbur was so sad.

Oh! And I also missed Wilbur fainting all the time! He fainted once this time, that's it. And one of the times he should have fainted, the horse did instead. They really didn't portray the pig that well, in my opinion.

The one good thing about this movie, however, is that they picked a good actor to play Templeton. No offense to Steve Buscemi, but Templeton was a greasy little rat who had a greasy, nasal voice and I think that Steve did a really good job. The voice could have been a little more... greasy, I guess is the only word I have here, but otherwise, way to go.

Another good thing -- so I guess there are two now -- about the 2006 movie was the detail on the web and the detail that went into making Charlotte spin the web. I loved to watch Charlotte. She was very well animated and I thought it was super neat how you could watch her spin the entire web and they would animate her every movement. I like the letters too. The letters in the words she wrote. That sounds like a petty thing to compliment, but they did a really good job with the web. That made me very happy.

So, to recap: in the 2006 Charlotte's Web, I missed the expression in the voices, the songs that were in the 1973 movie, as well as the lines, like the actual wording. They replaced a lot of the classic lines with newer, hipper, "puns" and goofy/corny/predictable lines. I liked the originals. But most of all I missed the goose because I loved her and she was my favourite character in 1973.

If you want my opinion -- and even if you don't -- it isn't a terrible movie for your kids to see. They may be a little bored, as I have seen from the 10,000 children talking/yelling/whining in the theatre, but they may also enjoy it. It's a cute family movie.

But if you are anything like me, or if you have seen the original movie yourself, you probably won't want to see this film, and your kids would probably enjoy the 1973 version of Charlotte's Web much, much more.

Just because a movie is "live-action" does not mean it is better than a traditional, animated cartoon.

Winter's Sleep

Stars twinkle above
The midnight mist.

Flakes of snow fall
Land on butterfly lashes,
Closing ever so slowly.
Ever so slightly
Pull me in.

Your lips on mine,
Give me warmth.
This winter world...

Make me feel
Like summer.

A beautiful dream...
Never wake me.

The Gospel According to the Simpsons

Yes, this is the text for one of my courses this term: Religion and the Media. I am excited.

There is also another text, of course, that is more academic I suppose: Media and Minorities. But let's focus on this one.

First day of class: Listen to Dr. Cantelo talk about her degrees, etc. How she is where she is. What she has done. Then, watch an episode of the Simpson's (the one where Bart sells his soul to Milhouse and Moe turns his bar into Uncle Moe's Family Feedbag). Excellent class. I laughed. The Simpson's is really funny, I realized.

I'm looking forward to this term, I think. I'm a little worried about marks, but that's supposed to happen right? I'm nervous for next year too, especially figuring out what I'm gonna do next year. I am looking into an MFA in Graphic Design, at U of M. I need a portfolio. I think I could throw together a portfolio. The only thing is that I don't know if it's like applying for a job. Should I apply to the Graphic Design program and something else? What if I don't get into Graphic Design?

Actually, if I didn't get into Graphic Design -- assuming I've decided that that's the direction I want to go in -- I don't think I would want to start another program anyway. What's the point? I would take a year off. That's what I would do. Cause why spend money for another year of doing not-what-I-want-to-do? Exactly. I'm so smart.

Hopefully, I get less confused and figure out where I'm headed before the school year ends. I thought university was supposed to help you focus and find out what you want to do, but I am finding it confuses me more and more with every course I take because I want to do everything. I find subjects like religion so interesting. But what would I do with a BA in Religious Studies? Unless I wanted to teach... which I don't.

This is enough thinking for one night.

...I'm crashing like a tidal wave; I don't wanna be stranded...